Layers and Multiples

We are in a semi-unusual situation regarding our church/fellowship. God has us going to the church we started attending before we moved for the services and ministry. However, for our fellowship, rather than going to a Sunday school class there, it works better with the kids schedule for us to be part of a Hometeam that meets here in our home one night during the week with the church that's right around the corner. In addition to that, the people are exactly where we are in life and wonderful to be around. We have tried to get to the services that the closer church has, but every time we've tried this year, our path has been blocked. Anyway, it's really neat to be part of two churches because of what God has been doing with me, what I've been learning and to have things confirmed from one church with the other.
So here's what's been going on: First, God is telling me that I need to give more. In both messages from each church, they were about being a good steward of finances, even though I'm not sure that God is speaking specifically about money to me. Right now, we don't seem to have any extra time or money to give, but I know that whatever He's asking me to do, as long as I say yes, we will have it to give. Now to just know if He's asking for money, time or both...
Second, forgiveness. As most of you know, a couple of years ago, right after I got pregnant with Button, my "best friend" hit on my husband and when he wouldn't reciprocate, she started a big blow up and told her husband that Techie was hitting on her. Needless to say we are no longer friends. Recently, our Hometeam talked about forgiveness, even in the most hurtful of circumstances. Now I thought I had done all the forgiving I needed to do in this situation. It's been two years, I've had time to mourn the passing of what I thought was a genuine friendship. But God showed me that I was holding on to bitterness where this person is concerned and I needed to let it go. So I did, thinking that's finally all there is to that!
Until today. I let this woman in my life. I talked very openly to her about my relationship and sometimes physical relationship with Techie. I "allowed" the nausea to bother me to the point that I had to sleep on the couch. She knew all this and as a result, I let my marriage be vulnerable. If I hadn't done any of that, we may not have had to go through this trial. I realized today that while I've asked God and Techie for forgiveness, I hadn't forgiven myself for the reasons I just stated. It was all my fault that it happened and I was to blame. Now any reasonable person would look at the whole situation and say that's ridiculous. And I know it is, so I had to forgive me today. I'm finally letting myself off the hook and saying that it wasn't ALL my fault. Her actions were her own. Praise God for freedom that comes from forgiveness!
And third, I feel that there's something more that God wants me to do. I know He wants me to be a mom and to raise my children into wonderful human beings that love Him with all their hearts, and I don't want to take away from that. But through the series that our Hometeam has been doing this Spring, I really feel that God is telling me that He wants me to do something in addition to being a mom that won't take away precious time from Squirt and Button. I haven't figured out it is yet, but I know that He'll reveal it in His timing and again as long as I say yes, He will bless whatever it is He has in store for me. :)